Today is my due date, or was. I was telling a friend that I was a little sad about not making it until today. She said even three years after her baby girl she still thinks about the what if's and that it always stings a little bit to think about. That's what I'm feeling today...a little sting. It makes me wonder why things didn't go as planned. I don't buy into that everything happens for a reason crap. I think it is what it is and it's just that simple. There probably is no reason. I do wish things had happened differently. I wish I had a natural birth story to tell. I wish baby Girl had weighed more at birth. I hope she develops those fat rolls on her legs soon. Is it one of those things I am never happy with any result? I am so thankful baby Girl is healthy, and that I am, too. But that doesn't mean I can't have a day to think about how things MIGHT have been.
So...hello and goodbye to what almost was, but never will be. Your due date was only an estimate...it's just a date...just a number on the calendar. July 11 is the best day of our lives and began our little family. I love that thought...our family. I've not had that before and it makes this mommy thing so much more sweet.
No comments:
Post a Comment