From Thanksgiving weekend

He said she not only believed in God but believed in them. Meaning the kids and grandkids. I wish my parents believed in me. I wish they were open to new ideas. I wish their home was always open and welcomed anyone, anytime. Its not that way, nor will it ever be. I sometimes think I want to go ahead and have kids so them knowing about me and my girl will be out of the way. I love my girl and crave her. I need her constant attention. She will tell me she needs attention and I love it. Dickweed would never let me ask for attention. He told me to quit being so needy. He would never lay in bed in the mornings and just hold me. He complained about having to talk to me at night before going to sleep. He would say "the bed is for sleeping". He didn't believe in quiet time. He had no emotions. How did I stay with him as long as I did? Why? I am asking myself that more and more. Out of convienience I suppose is why I didn't leave beforehand. He sent me a goodbye email for my bday of all days. The most important day of the year to me. The best birthday I have ever had he tried to fuck up. I didn't let that happen. He has NO control any longer. And its killing him. Its been 4 months and he still hasn't moved on. I'm so in love with HER. Nothing else matters. I will do anything in the world for her even if that includes waking up Christmas am w/ her and her family. I don't necissarily want to spend Christmas Eve @ home alone but I am going to want some alone time w/ her to open gifts between just us. Family is important to her on Christmas. I will do whatever she wants. I plan to have Christmas with my family