Ultrasound and Dewar

We had our CD11 ultrasound today. My left ovary appears to have a dominant follicle of 13 mm. We went to the NP's office after the ultrasound to get our report. She wants us to come back Wednesday for a 2nd ultrasound. I wish I could eat something to make my follicle grow!! Our NP is going out of town on Thursday afternoon for the holiday weekend so here's hoping it grows a lot in the next 3 days.

As we were waiting to see the NP, the UPS man delivered our dewar!! 

More updates to follow on Wednesday....

Order Placed

I plan to frame the invoice. We ordered our vial. This is the first month of TTC. Donor #xxxx. He sounds beautiful. I know our baby will be, too. Our ultrasound is scheduled for 5/21 @ 11:30. They will check my follicle size, and endometrial lining. Depending on those #'s is when we will inseminate. I am hoping it will be Tuesday or Wednesday. The dewar will be delivered Monday, and we have access to it for 7 days. Since Memorial Day falls in that 7 days, we actually have 8 days. The vial is guaranteed for 7, tho.

I am so excited. Is that the right word? Not really. It's surreal. It doesn't seem 100% real just yet. Maybe it will Monday. I have a calm about it I didn't expect. I am usually lying awake at night when I worry. I haven't. Everything has fallen into place... especially aunt Flo's arrival. She came on the PERFECT date. Who knew I'd be wanting to see her so badly?

I can see him, feel him, and almost sense his presence already. He is still just a follicle...nothing even remotely close to fertilized. But he is there...I just know it.

This time next week I could potentially be a mommy.

WOW

Nervous

Aunt Flo is supposed to visit this Thursday. When I think about it, I get butterflies in my stomach. When AF shows up, I am to call our nurse practitioner and she will schedule our ultrasound. She had mentioned CD 10 or 11. Well both of those days fall on a weekend, AND we are out of town. We could have an ultrasound on CD 9, or wait until CD 12. I am going to rely on the expert, but I REALLY am not liking giving someone else the control.

I am about to burst at the seams. I am scared to death but in a good way. It's the biggest decision I've ever made in my life. It's been a little tense around here for the past few days. The mother in law moved out this weekend. It was time. The constant butterflies in my stomach make me even more anxious that I'm not going to get a visit from AF on Thursday. I hope it doesn't come sooner...but if it comes later maybe it will be Friday. That would make my CD 11 on Monday.

I've never wanted a visit from Aunt Flo so much in my life. I'm on pins and needles to see her. It could potentially be the last time I see her for 9-10 months!!

Now...the Biebs is on the Voice. I'm going to watch. I wish we could get a donor that looks like him, if he were about a foot taller. 

1 year anniversary

We flew to NYC for our 1 year anniversary. Quick documentation:

Friday--get up at 3:55 am. Fly to LGA. Check-in at hotel and check our luggage at baggage counter. Grab a hot dog and italian sausage from a street vendor ($16 yikes!) and head to the subway. Go south to the Museum of Sex. HOLY SMOKES--that was a cool museum. So much info!! Went into basement for a drink and chocolate. Fun.

Went to Little Italy. Ate late lunch. Not very good. Went to Ferrara's for cafe mocha/latte and sample desserts. WOW. Some of the best italian desserts I've had. Napoleon was our favorite. Went to Chinatown. Bargained about purses. Went into back alley shop...didn't have what we were looking for but sure felt like we were doing something illegal--especially when they pulled back the black curtains in the "nail salon".

Caught the subway to the Stanton Island Ferry. Rode over at sunset. Got beautiful pics of the state of Liberty. Gorgeous. Stayed at Stanton Island about an hour in the terminal then rode back over to Manhattan and saw the skyline at dark. The new world trade building is breathtaking. So beautiful, and so many emotions.

Tried to find the right bus out of Stanton station...talked to a cop who led us in right direction. We missed bus time and another wouldn't arrive for 20 min. Took taxi to the Stanton Social. 2nd HOLY SMOKES this was delicious. We had drinks upstairs before we were seated. So trendy and I didn't feel dressed appropriately, but my Wife didn't mind. We were seated then ate some of the best food ever. Tuna, pierogis, cashew chicken rolls, and kobe philly cheesesteak. Dessert was doughnuts with three dipping sauces. They brought us champagne for our anniversary, and a cupcake with dessert. So sweet.

We got back to the hotel late...got to our room and they had assigned us 2 double beds. Not working. Went back downstairs for a king bed. Key card didn't work. I sat at door of hotel, my Wife went downstairs to discuss. She came back with key that words. Fell asleep QUICKLY...very long day.

Set 9 am wake-up call. Ordered room service coffee/mocha. I surprised my Wife and brought a BITE of our wedding cake. She loved it. Got ready and went to NBC experience store. Walked to Central Park. Had a wonderful time watching people. Rented a paddle boat and floated for an hour. PERFECT. Loved this a lot. Walked back to hotel, stopped in bar for a drink to take upstairs for getting ready. Opened our gifts to each other for our 1 year anniversary. She gave me a sweatshirt I had been DYING for since last year. I.LOVE.IT!! Before we went to NYC she had given me my main gift--a canvas of my favorite wedding photo and a card that made me cry. I LOVE it SO much!!!

We were hurried to get ready...made it to the Brasserie on time. Had dinner--escargot, french onion soup, scallops, and steak. We walked to Times Square before cutting over to our play. We saw the Book of Mormon. HILARIOUS!!! Not for the faint of heart---such a religious satire. Afterwards we walked through Hell's Kitchen. Walked to the Yotel--the place was dead. I drank some water then we walked to the XL Club. It's attached to the new hotel called the Out--they deem themselves straight-friendly. We were told to get in line and have our ID's ready. As we approached the bouncer/security checking ID's he asked how many were in our party. We said two. He said he was sorry but on Sat nights we must have a male escort to enter. WTF???? We couldn't believe what we were hearing...AT A GAY BAR!!! We turned away and even had another security guy shaking his head in disbelief. A woman stopped us just a few feet away and asked what just happened. She said she lived just down the street and had been wanting to go to the bar. After we told her what had just happened, she couldn't believe it. She was shocked. I tweeted Chely Wright about it, and she retweeted it to her 27K+ followers. I had four others retweet it. Such discrimination. I hear that the women bars sometimes do the same thing in NYC. Crazy!

We finally gave up and went back to our hotel room. Got a drink at the bar then went up to our room for some sweet time.

Sunday morning we were so tired but we got up and got ready. We headed down to Ess-A-Bagel and got some DELICIOUS bagels (cheddar cream cheese for my Wife, and cream cheese lox for me + a chocolate cream cheese to share) Lovely. We walked to Times Square and took in all it has to offer. There were SO many people!! I've never seen it so packed. We saw the Naked Cowboy!!! We grabbed a passion lemonade at Starbucks and headed back to our hotel to get our bags and leave for the airport.

We had a layover going and coming in Baltimore.

I cannot thank my mother in law enough for this perfect two day trip. We are so blessed to have her support, love, and desire to see us happy. We spent more than we intended to, but we are both so very grateful.

Happy 1 year anniversary to us!!

2 Months

Has it really been 2 months since I've written anything down?

Let's see...

I am SO ready to be pregnant and have a baby. I think about it each day. I go to work for him/her five days a week. I lay in bed thinking about nursery colors and feeding our baby natural foods.

We are considering a Vitamix. I wonder if we would actually use it. Would it be worth the investment?

We have overhauled our financed. My Wife made a handy dandy excel spreadsheet and color coded different types of spending. She's smart like that. So organized! I think this will help greatly. Our finances are not what they were...I took a pretty good pay cut by going to the hospital full time. But it will be worth it with paid maternity leave, vacation, and insurance benefits.

I mentioned to my mom we're thinking about having kids. She asked if I had gone to the doctor to get everything checked out. I told her I had. She replied with "time will tell". I told her I would need to have a book handy because I didn't know anything about kids. She said she relied on the baby's 1st year book a lot after she had me because so much had changed between my sister being born and me. I told her I wished she lived closer so she could nanny...she said she would just have to nanny from afar. I have been trying to think of a good way to tell them when we're pregnant. My sister sent her an e-card...and got no response. When my sister finally called mom a few days later to ask if she got the e-card. Mom replied with "yes", and left it at that. She was not excited about the situation my sister had put herself in.

I'd like to lose about 5 more lbs before getting pregnant. Hope I can make that happen.

I started taking Barlean's fish oil swirl (mango flavor) this week. I read where it's great for women's hormones and health. Maybe it will help us conceive!!

It's about time to start picking out our donor. We have picked out our sperm bank. I think we're going to each go thru the donors and narrow it down to our top 5, then bring our lists together and go from there.

Another Reading

My Wife got me another reading with our clairvoyant back in November for my birthday. It was difficult to schedule a session over the holidays so we booked it for Jan 3, 7 pm. We were 1 hr late getting to talk--she forgot I am two hours ahead of her, rather than one. No big shakes.

We exchanged pleasantries then she asked if I wanted to ask any questions or just see what happens. I went with the latter. She immediately said "Are you and your Wife going to get pregnant in 2012?" I confirmed we ARE planning to try. She said "you're going to have a baby in March of 2013". WOW!! That would put it exactly in line with us conceiving in May 2012, our PLAN!! She then said if it's not March it will be in the first six months of the year, spring/early summer. She said we'll have a boy and he has dark hair. I have always felt I will have a boy, and we're shopping for dark haired donors. She said we will have a girl 2 to 3 years after our boy. She told me I will have a lot of vomiting and morning sickness with my pregnancy. She also said I should drink red raspberry leaf tea.

I asked about my Wife's father. She said he is proud of me, and even more proud of my Wife. He said he had worried she would not find someone to love her the way she deserves, and he was so happy. He said no one has ever loved her the way I do. WOW, I started getting tears in my eyes. I asked her if she could tell him something for me? She said I could tell him, but she can, too. I asked her to tell him I am so glad he had such a wonderful daughter and I wish I had known him. She said he is in a good place, he is getting to do what he loves. She asked if he was an outdoorsman, I confirmed. She brought up something about a dog. She said if it was a yorkie, I said yes. She asked the dogs name, I told her Baby. She said my Wife's dad was laughing and said what kind of name is that? She said he is a jokester. She mentioned my Wife's sister (who has also passed away). She pretty much told me the same things she had in a previous reading about her.

I asked about my parents. She asked their names and then asked if my dad was retired. I told her yes. She asked about my mom's health. I told her at the last reading she mentioned my moms heart and I had mentioned it to my mom. She said it didn't necessarily mean it was physical, but could be a sadness. I asked about my aunt (mom's youngest sister). She said she won't survive this (brain cancer) and has already decided in her head not to fight, she has accepted what will be will be. She asked about her husband, and said they are not emotionally connected, and has already checked out. I wasn't surprised at any of that. She said my mom feels guilty it's not her with the brain tumor instead...not surprising either.

I asked about my sister--she said she is full of judgement and some jealousy. She said when you get that combination it's not good. She didn't give me any hope that she will change. She asked if she was a fundamentalist Christian, I confirmed. She said she has bought into the religion and has a lot of confusion about her own beliefs. She said she struggles with her own self.

I asked my niece...she said she's VERY smart. She said she could be the president of the united states if she wanted to be, highly intelligent. She said she is withdrawing from her parents because her parents fight a lot. She said my niece trusts me and needs to know she can talk to me about anything. I said I hope she doesn't grow up to be as judgmental as her mother, the clairvoyant said my niece is already starting to question what her parents are teaching her.

We talked about the baby some more. I asked about my job, she said I'm good on my job and not to worry about anything. She told me to quit worrying about so much, to try to relax. We talked about the baby yet again. I asked about our finances, she said everything is fine there.

I LOVED this birthday gift from my wife. I wish I could talk to the clairvoyant every day!! I enjoyed the reading, and look forward to getting to talk to her again. Her prices have gone up so I'm not real sure when that might happen, but she made me even less of a skeptic this time. She is RIGHT ON with so many things.

New Years Resolutions

2012 New Year's Resolutions:

Numero Uno...Get Pregnant

Number 2...Be Kind(er), have more patience

Number 3...eat healthier. Documenting Weight December 31, 2011: 155 lbs. (period, after eating, mid-day)

*******************************************************

Met with our fertility FNP this past Thursday...everything is ready for us to start making a baby in 2012. Vitamins are correct. No more charting BBT or buying OPK's. She will use ultrasound and my period length only. If we run into problems, we'll looking into BBT and OPK's, but hoping that will not happen.

Job is going well.

Christmas was spent at work. My Wife and I opened gifts on Christmas Eve. She got me a black down vest from Eddie Bauer I've been wanting. Also a beautiful hand painting with photo. She got me some cute ear rings, a ring, and a stocking full of nicky nacks. She's the best and most thoughtful gift giver. I love that in the millions of reasons I adore her. I got sick the week before Christmas, and am just now fully recovering. I was miserable and had to take a Z-pak. I ate dinner with my friend DS Chrismtas night, because my Wife was back home with her family. I felt horrible so we didn't stay long, at the Waffle House. I came home and watched Christmas Vacation and fell asleep.

NYE we are going to west TN to my Wife's aunt's house. This is where we went two years ago and had a great time. I'm looking forward to 2012. 2011 was a year of ups and downs...Gram passed was the lowest of the year, but our wedding/reception was the highest. Lots of changes with my job. I am ready for 2012...I don't know that I've looked forward to a year more than this one. Planning our baby is SO exciting to me, minus the daunting task of picking out a donor.

CHEERS!